Read Oh Crap! Potty Training Everything Modern Parents Need to Know to Do It Once and Do It Right Oh Crap Parenting Jamie Glowacki 9781501122989 Books

Product details Series Oh Crap Parenting (Book 1) Paperback 288 pages Publisher Gallery Books; First Paperback Edition edition (June 16, 2015) Language English ISBN-10 1501122983

Oh Crap! Potty Training Everything Modern Parents Need to Know to Do It Once and Do It Right Oh Crap Parenting Jamie Glowacki 9781501122989 Books Reviews

• As with any parenting book, this one has its pros and cons. When I first read it, I didn't mind the dismissive, humiliating tone. I had a toddler in the "window" the author deems appropriate and I was reading this book, so I was obviously doing everything right from the start. The problem is the author sets you up for success if you follow the rules, but when you fail at part of the process you a) feel like you've royally messed up and b) don't get a lot of in depth information on how to get back on track. This is a very emotional process on its own, but I feel like the author's tone does not help ease any of the anxieties that come with potty training.
  
  I cannot speak for the nighttime process yet (although from the sounds of it, I think we'll just wing it and ignore the author's advice), but the day-to-day potty training process can and does work. While we had lots of issues crop up, my daughter eventually "got it" after 1 full week of training. The things I liked about this book were the clear and concise plan that was laid out. I also really appreciated the author's stance on not giving up and saying your child isn't ready when things get hard. Your child is not going to magically potty train themselves. It is going to be a frustrating process, but they WILL get it. Going back and forth between diapers and the potty is confusing and not at all helpful. During our process, I had many people tell me that maybe my daughter just wasn't ready and I should try again later. This book helped me combat that idea. First, I was NOT interested in re-living the potty training process over again (did I mention it's HARD?). Second, my child displayed all the signs of readiness before we started and I KNEW she was capable of learning something new. The book helped me put my foot down and stick with it, even when it was miserable. I also really liked the idea of not giving rewards for going potty. My daughter responded wonderfully to praise and we invented our own little celebration song because of it. Even now that she goes regularly she gets very excited about it and is SO proud of herself. I love that she did not need a sticker or a piece of candy to know she was doing a good job.
  
  The things I did not like about this book were the set age window for which to potty train. My 27 month old showed all the signs of readiness, but the author suggests she would have been just as ready as early as 18 month old. My daughter communicates well for her age, but even with that I can't imagine explaining and doing this all at 18 months old. And with the age window ending at 2.5 years, I felt like the odds were stacked against us with every minute that passed and she was not potty trained. Never mind the fact she makes it sound like, if your child isn't getting it, it is 100% your fault. The chapter on daycare is particularly depressing and set me up to believe my daughter's school was going to be difficult to work with. They were not. In fact, they were our biggest cheerleaders during the process and continue to champion my child (as they should.) To suggest to someone that, if their daycare does not comply with all the rules in this book, you should move your child to another daycare is insanity. Your kid is having trouble potty training, so why not uproot their entire day-to-day life and see how that goes? Horrible advice. Basically, the general tone of this book creates so much anxiety that I can see why so many parents are turned off by it.
  
  There were many troubleshooting suggestions that were simply the cliff's notes explanations of how to deal with issues. Some of them state the obvious but give you no real solution. For instance
  -Prompt, but don't OVER prompt your child.
  -Your child does not get a choice about sitting on the potty, but don't turn sitting on the potty into a punishment.
  -If your child is misbehaving during the potty training process, it is okay to discipline them as you normally would, but don't ever punish them in regards to the potty.
  
  Also, the author mentions a Facebook group to commiserate with experts and fellow parents. There is not one; just a page for the book that posts some teaser blog posts and directs you to the book itself. I suspect if you really want that kind of support, you'll need to pay their consultants to help you.
  
  All and all, this book has some great tactics and can really help you potty train your child. Just be prepared to roll your eyes a lot at the author's tone and her anecdotes about all the amazing things she does for her own child (controlled diet, progressive schooling, etc.) that don't necessarily fit into most people's reality. If she would just stick to the facts, this would be a lot shorter book and I suspect more people would follow through with its teachings.
• I had read a few other guides to potty training before this but had been told this was the best. Unfortunately, reading it stressed me out. I will probably use some of the suggestions (learning to notice subtle cues, telling not asking when it's time to go to the bathroom), but the overall tone felt judgmental and smug. My son is 34 months which is the "danger zone," as she says, because I've already missed the window for training him easily. Huh? What a cruel generalization! Also, based on my son's previous behavior she would classify him as a "kid from hell." Again, not helpful. I was just starting to think "holy crap, we have more dysfunction in our family than I realized!" when I decided to look at the author's qualifications. I can't tell what they are either from the book, from her blog, Google, whatever. She has been a social worker at some point, so what. She's devised a method that is helpful for many parents, so what. I think if she was a real professional counseling families according to real ethical/professional standards, she would know not to talk down to parents.
• This book simply didn’t not work for my child. I took an entire week (7 full days) off to dedicate to potty training according to the method and found that it was a complete failure. The author breaks down potty training into 3 block. My child did extremely well in the first block during which the child is naked and keeping a little potty nearby at all times. As soon as we moved on to the second block, the whole thing fell apart. He was having accidents nonstop. I reread the book twice trying to find some specific advice as to why this was happening and found nothing helpful. The only thing the author keeps says is maybe the kid doesn’t know how to pull down pants to pee or the parent is not paying enough attention to the signs. Neither of which are true. There were no strategies or specific instructions on how to resolve or troubleshoot even though she entire chapters devoted to these topics.
  
  So after an extremely frustrating 7 days of beating myself up for being inattentive, I decided to start over with a different method of training (Potty Training in 3 Days by Brandi Brucks). Much of her early training techniques are the complete opposite of Jamie Glowacki’s instructions. The results are AMAZING! On the first day, I put my child in underwear and my child was TELLING and SIGNALING to me to go to the bathroom. After only 1 accident, my child was successfully using the potty in the bathroom.
  
  I’m sure that this method might work for some children, but just know that it might now work for all. The author’s tone and general descriptions of how things work puts way too much burden and stress on the parents when potty training using her method doesn’t work out. If it works for you, great. If not, give another method a go. Potty training is hard enough without blaming yourself if the method doesn’t work.